May 25, 2005

• Why Geeks and Nerds Are Worth It…
  Reply to: anon-66795671@craigslist.org
  Date: Sun Apr 03 21:30:08 2005
  In the wide world of dating, there are many options. Do you go for the
  flashy guy with the smooth smile, or the dude in the corner typing away
  on his laptop? The following are reasons why I think my fellow females
  should pay more attention to the quiet geeks and nerds, and less attention
  to the flashy boys.

  1.) While geeks and nerds may be awkward, they’re well-meaning 9 out
  of 10 times. That smooth dude with the sly grin and the spider hands?
  Wonder what HIS intentions are… plus, I’ve never had a geek guy not
  call me when he said he would. Score major points THERE.

  2.) They’re useful. In this tech-savvy world, it’s great to have a b/f
  who can make your laptop, desktop, and just about anything else that plugs
  into a wall behave itself.

  3.) They’re more romantic than they’re given credit for. Ok true, their
  idea of romance might be to make up a spiffy web-page with all the reasons
  why they love you, with links to pics of you and sonnets and such… but
  hey. It lasts longer than flowers, plus you can show your friends.

  4.) Due to their neglected status, there are plenty to choose from. You
  like ‘em tall and slender? There are plenty of geeks/nerds who are. You
  like ‘em smaller with more meat on their bones? Got that too.

  5.) They’ve got brains. Come on now, how can intelligence be a bad thing?

  6.) Most are quite good at remembering dates. Like birthdates and such,
  especially if they know it’ll make you happy. Due again to their neglected
  status, they’re more attentive than guys who “have more options”. Plus,
  with all that down time without a steady girlfriend, they’ll likely have
  mental lists of all the things they’d love to do once they GOT a girlfriend.

  7.) Sex. Yep. Sex. I’m not really familiar with this myself, but I’ve
  friends who’ve been intimate with geek guys and it’s raves all around.
  They say a virgin wrote the Kama Sutra… all that time thinking about
  sex, imagining sex, dreaming about sex, (they are male after all) coupled
  with a desire to make you happy? Use your imagination.

  8.) They’re relatively low-maintenance. Most can be fueled on pizza, Twinkies
  and Mt Dew. No complicated dinners needed here, so if you’re not the best
  cook, eh. Can you order a pizza?

  9.) Most frequent bars as often as slugs frequent salt mines. You won’t
  have to worry much about your geek guy getting his “groove” on with club
  hotties because, frankly, he’ll be too busy rooting around under his computer
  wondering where that spare cable went. You won’t have to worry about him
  flirting with other women because, 9 out of 10 times, he’ll zip right
  by them in a perfect b-line towards the nearest electronics store. I’ve
  seen this happen.
  Me: “Eww. Victoria Secret’s Models… They’re so skinny. How is that feminine?
  You can see her ribs!”
  Geek Guy: “ooooooo…”
  Me: “Hey!” *notices he is staring lustfully towards the computer store*
  Geek Guy: “What?”
  Me: “Never mind…”

  10.) Although he may not want to go to every outing with you, you can
  arrange swaps, as in, you’ll go to his Gamer Con dressed as an elf princess
  if he’ll take you to the ballet. Plus, if he doesn’t want to go someplace
  with you, you won’t have to worry much about what he’s up to. You’ll probably
  come home to find him asleep on his keyboard in a sea of Mt. Dew cans
  with code blinking from the screen. It’s ok. He’s used to this. Just toss
  a blanket over him and turn out the light.

  11.) His friends aren’t jerks. I can’t stress this enough. You’ll more
  likely get “Omg! A GIRL!! Can I see?!” than “Hey hot stuff back that ass
  up here and let me get some grub on…” They’re awkward geeks too and
  will, 9 times out of 10, treat you with the utmost respect and, more than
  likely, a note of awe. A cute girl picked one of their clan to date? It
  could happen to them! Hope! Drag some of your single girlfriends over,
  open up a pack of Mt. Dew, crack open the DnD set and get working. Nothing
  impresses geek guys more than a girl who can hack-n-slash (well ok maybe
  if she can code… a geek can dream).

  12.) They’re rarely if ever possessive. They trust you, so you can be
  yourself around them. You like to walk around the house in a ratty t-shirt
  for comfort? He won’t care. He does too! They won’t get pissy if you don’t
  wear make-up or don’t want to bother primping your hair. If you gain a
  few pounds, they won’t try their best to make you feel like crap.

  13.) They’re usually very well educated. Physics majors and the like.
  See #5. You won’t have to listen to him blathering on about his car (ok
  maybe a little), he’ll have loads of other interesting things to talk
  about. Politics, world events, how much the chicken burgers down at the
  local place rock, so long as you douse them in hot sauce…

  14.) You’ll almost never have to hear, “Yaw dawg whazzap!!” plop out of
  their mouths. Unless it’s in jest. They spell properly, use correct punctuation,
  and are able to tell the difference between the toilet and the floor.
  They almost never get “wasted”, so you won’t have to worry about coming
  home to find him and his friends passed out on the floor amidst a pile
  of beer bottles. Mt. Dew cans, perhaps…

  15.) And the final reason why geeks and nerds make great boyfriends: They
  actually give a damn about you. Not how you look (though that’s a plus),
  not how skinny you are, not how much make-up you primp yourself up with,
  but they like you for you. That kind of thing lasts longer than “DaMN
  baby you got a fine ass!!!” Believe me.

  • 4:14 pm
  • 18 Comments