December 27, 2002
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swan dive.
the year is coming to an end, almost before i realized it was over.
the past year, i've been through a lot; the disappointment in myself, struggling with where i want to be, struggling with who i want to be, losing and gaining friendships, dealing with the quicksand of my feelings for k.
it leaves me very melancholy, yet it's a beautiful and bittersweet thing. reminiscing about the past year, i've found myself on the verge of tears, but it's not a sad thing. to me, being here another year, being able to look back on it and know it's the past, is a good positive thing. i'm not there anymore.
i'm poised on my toes, on the verge of diving head first into a life worth living.
Comments (23)
i feel the exact same...but i don't know how to start living, really living, and forging new friendships.
wonderful wonderful sentiments and i'll drink to that. it's what is life is all about isn't it? learning from the past and always hoping for a better future.
hope the new years bring you lots of beers, love, joy, and laughter.
Well said my friend, well said.
that's a beautiful thing to hear you say. i think each day we are able to survive and live thru gives us just a little more to hold on to. . .a little more strength. be well.
mm...leaves me to think of what kind of year i've had.
beautiful new layout by the way.
hang in there .. you have a whole year ahead to start fresh ... wipe the slate clean so to speak ... ~hugs~ Mwwuaahhh (ohh don't tell riott I gave you one her smoochies heh)
i have been feeling alot like that lately. i like the new layout. if you ever want to talk, i'm here.
xoxo
good for you! i love the new look btw... color!
Got me thinking.....thanks. *smile*
Hope your new year finds you in a higher, happier place.
I wanted to say something really pervy but I just can't.
That's a very healthy outlook.
Personally I can't wait till it's all over with.
A beautiful entry. Masterful!
I wish you well. 3 more days to go. A new beginning to wake up to.
Bon courage.
(Nice background, I like. Russia ? Prague ?)
Good luck.
lovely space that you've got here. you're a beautiful soul,indeed. i dig your choice in music, i have this friend whose a musician and is talented beyond words and he's always telling me (of 'blue and yellow') 'why couldn't i have written that?'
wishing you a happy new year!
i'll agree with the year being eventful...everything sort of turned out ok though...looking forward to another year talking to you
xoxo
cool background pic!
happy New Year!
my year has been mediocre at best. there's a sign at my job that says something like "without adversity, we would not appreciate the good stuff as much." so i'm trying to remember that.
Happy New Year!
*clink!*
whenever you come to cali let me know k. oh wait. shit. i'm going to boot camp in 11 days! umm maybe some other time.
hehhe
cheers
~michelle
great sentiment you have posted here-
i love the new look of your site!
Oh man, you have got one of the most beautiful sites on xanga!!! and that picture of the "dive" is perfect!
and on K... I wrote this beginnings of a poem on someone else's site, but it applies to your situation as well...crazy love. the best and worst kind there is....first you love then you hate...then you're left wondering this...
ps. I'm positively GREEN about your "hook-up" w/ the Adaptation tape (can I borrow it?!?)... it's still not opening in my area tomorrow!
Happy New Year sweeties... and it will be, you just wait and see.
have the days behind not been worth living and worth experiencing as well?
....brighter futures and lessons learned, i hope...
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