September 30, 2002


  • ...and it becomes a whirlwind

    there were times in my life, times that became a maelstrom of events. when things were so chaotic, so out of control that i was forced to either become the earth-solid monolith in the eye of the storm, or get pulled into the terrifying circumstance.
    you could give this phenomenon a name; you could call it uranus. you could call it chaos. you could call it an act of the random. my personal terminology for this is the whirlwind.
    life moves, time marches, mostly in an orderly procession, a nice chain of events. if you're observant enough, there are times when it becomes predictable.
    when the whirlwind came, there were no harbingers, there was no foreshadowing. it happened like a car wreck. like a heart attack in a deep sleep. it happened with the quantum quality unfairly reserved for subatomic particles.
    i wouldn't call it a distinct misfortune or opportunity - it just is. it becomes what i make of it when the winds have died down, the debris falls and the dust settles. it becomes a lesson if i consciously choose to learn from it. it becomes a tragedy if that's what i want.
    i've had the whirlwind dervish dance through my life several times, and all but once was i in the eye. maybe during those times, i was the eye. the cold, calm eye of the whirwind.

    "And you may ask yourself - Well...How did I get here?"
    -the talking heads, once in a lifetime.

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